Parents: Help Protect Your Teen's MENTAL HEALTH

It’s Mental Health Awareness Month, and we’re in the midst of a teen mental health crisis in the US. Parenting an adolescent is not for lightweights—I should know after surviving four of them. Those sweet, angelic, mischievous children we knew and loved morph into moody, hormonal lounge-lizards who leave a trail of smelly clothes, food detritus, and righteous arguments wherever they go (in my experience, anyway). And that was on a good day.

I tried to remember that besides growing into adult bodies, teens are trying to establish their independence and wean themselves away from their loving family so they are able to strike out on their own someday. Consider that It’s their job to make you start wishing for this day to come sooner rather than later.

It's also important to remember that teenagers are still kids and they need our implicit love and acceptance, along with calm, firm guidance, even if they won’t admit it. One of the most important things we can do is to help them protect their mental health by developing healthy habits now

There are three things that are working hard against teens today and driving up rates of mental illness:

1. Overuse of screens and social media—that contributes to

2. Less meaningful connection with live humans or loneliness (the pandemic really exacerbated this)

3. Not enough sleep, healthy diet, or exercise— These can all lead to and/or exacerbate poor mental health.

Stated conversely: Limited screen time, meaningful connection with family, friends, and community, along with healthy lifestyle habits (enough sleep, good diet, and regular exercise) are what we ALL need to stay mentally (and physically) healthy. This goes doubly for teens as they are still growing and developing. Even significant mental illness can usually be more successfully coped with and managed in part by adhering to the above.

Here are a few tips:

Talk to your teen about mental health. Let them know that it's okay to talk about how they're feeling and that you will try to listen and not judge. When a young person feels loved, accepted, and respected, as well as free to express themselves (respectfully), they can handle whatever life throws at them a lot better than not. Even if you are at loggerheads about curfews, grades, and disaster-area rooms, in the end, they know you have their back. Isn’t that what we all need?
Set and enforce limits on screen time. It’s hard for them to do themselves. You need to be the bad guy. See the link below for some ideas. Too much screen time is firmly linked to soaring rates of depression, and anxiety, not to mention sleep problems, so…
Make sure your teen is getting enough sleep. Teens need about 8-10 hours of sleep each night. Getting enough sleep can make a huge difference in a teen’s overall health, outlook, and ability to process stress.
Encourage your teen to eat a healthy diet. (Do your best and good luck.) Cutting back on sugar and processed foods and eating nutritious foods can help improve mood, energy levels, and overall health, too. Sometimes moodiness or even feeling overwhelmed can be traced directly to low blood sugar.
Encourage your teen to get involved in activities they enjoy. This should involve some kind of physical exercise--sports, dance, martial arts. Also, encourage involvement in clubs, music, or other extracurricular activities of interest. Being involved in activities can help teens stay active, make friends, and learn new skills. It can help them cope with stress and difficult emotions. Best of all, it allows them to practice socializing and connecting in 3-D physical reality—not on a screen.
Be a good role model. Show your teen how to cope with stress and difficult emotions in a healthy way. I know, tall order.
Get help if your teen is struggling. If you're concerned about your teen's mental health, don't hesitate to seek professional help. You can start with your primary care physician or even the school wellness center. Professional support can make a big difference. If you’re unsure where to start, call 988. It’s a great, free resource.

It's not always easy, but helping a kid develop healthy habits can protect them throughout their lives and result in happy, reasonably well-adjusted adults. Check out Child Mind Institute for articles and videos for help with numerous child and teen behavioral issues.

Check out this article on how social media affects teens.

And here’s a link to an article to help you set limits on screen time.

Who am I? An author of novels for young adults, a former suicide crisis line counselor, a mental health advocate, and a mom and grandma with a soft spot for mischievous children. Here’s my latest: